Perfection vs. Perfection
This is strictly my opinion, but I feel it is true. I believe there are two types of perfection. One in which we will never measure up and one in which we can be perfect right now. This might seem strange at first, but let me explain.
The first type of perfection says you need to climb a ladder, get to the top, and be the best. And if you do not, you have failed. If you do everything you can, and if your children do as well, then you have made it. Congratulations! But if any one of you messes up, then you fall from grace. Math takes over and there is nothing we can do to measure up. We will always fall short. I believe this perfection to be fear based and will fundamentally ruin your life and the life of those around you if this path is pursued.
But the other type of perfection is what I think about when I think of a baby or child learning how to walk. It is challenging, but something they are determined to do. There is no swaying them or stopping them from doing it. They are not afraid to keep trying even though they keep falling down. You can see the focus and motivation in their eyes. And by pursuing such a great feat for them is perfection. They were meant to walk and so, something inside of them moves them forward to pursue it.
I believe we have bought into a lie. We believe in the first type of perfection whole heartedly. We trust in others to tell us what is normal, acceptable and good and then we pursue it because we don’t want to be wrong or bad. We do it out of fear and comparative feelings of trying to measure up and feel ok. And it will never work. There is always going to be someone who is better, stronger, faster. It is impossible. So for some of us we have determined to give up the fight and no longer try. We believe the lies that we will never be enough.
But if we believe in this other type of perfection in which we are motivated by all that is good and feel determined to pursue not because of others but because of what we personally believe to be right for ourselves…That my friends is perfection indeed. It is not trying to shape and change anyone into who we think they should be including ourselves. It is not trying to measure up to anything but what we deem to be right and good for us. We are no longer afraid of what others think of us, but go after what brings joy and light into our lives. It is living with love to give ourselves space to grow and do the same for others as well.
I have lived both sides of perfection. And I can tell you the one I would rather live. The one side that says I will never measure up, I have let go of. And keep letting go of each day. It no longer brings me peace and it makes me feel depressed and dark. I choose to go the path of light, peace and oneness. The path that says, just pursue and that is enough. There is nothing more or less than that. It is still a struggle, but one worth pursuing on a path that gives light and meaning, knowing there isn’t anything else that is needed. When I believe in this type of perfection there are infinite possibilities and abundance. Living with this type of belief gives me hope.